Queen sang about it, dictators demand it, and the lucky have it – with a twist. I am of course referring to “having it all”.
And the twist. While it is virtually impossible to have it all (unless of course the idea of a coup is attractive to you), having “your” all is possible. It simply requires luck. And luck as you may or may not recall isn’t really luck at all. I love the famous quote “Luck is what happens when preparation meets opportunity”. Recently working with a successful realtor she shared the idea that her client’s “lucky” experience is exactly that. The prep work she does along with identifying opportunities is the key that helps her clients “have their all” whether that’s closing or opening a new chapter in their life.
Society promotes having it all and I must confess this is a concept I have struggled with for much of my adult life. If I have it all does that mean someone else has to go without? Will having it all really make me happy? What if I don’t care about the “things” that are part of having it all and/or it sucks the soul out of me to get those “things”? Hence the reason I have shifted my thinking from having it all to having “my” all. Living the life you want, a life with deep purpose is not for the faint of heart. It requires soul searching, self-awareness and a willingness to ask yourself (and answer) difficult questions.
If you feel so inclined to embark on this journey, I have a tool the Having My All Road Map which I am happy to share. The first step is to define your desired result or heart’s desire and the second step is to identify the gaps – what needs your attention or to change to get your there. While I have it sequenced as step 1 and 2, life isn’t always that linear so you may want to conduct your gap analysis first (as in the Having My All Roadmap) to help you identify what matter most and then with your new found clarity identify your desired result.
A recent interview in Wired Magazine with Clayton Christensen (The Innovator’s Dilemma and soon to be published The Capitalist’s Dilemma author and Harvard Professor) summed it up quite nicely and I quote “What do we have to do differently today if we want different outcomes in our lives? There is a theory about deliberate and emergent strategy. The deliberate strategy allows you to choose the kind person you want to become. But at the same time you need emergent strategy, which allows you to embrace the serendipity.” I would say that is the equivalent of luck – preparedness meeting opportunity.